I've decided that 2011 is the year I will finally accept that I am great and I can do whatever I want to. It is very hard for me to push myself professionally and creatively—to find new clients and tell them how much better off they'll be if they hire me. I don't like to convince people. It feels weird and vaguely immodest to talk about my work and how great I am. What I need is a shift in my thinking, to realize that it's not about bragging, just simply informing people. Because not everyone knows me and if they knew me, if I gave them a chance to know me, they would see how great I am and want to work with me. (Related: I recently got a new client (via my great friend Holly) who told me on the phone that she thought my portfolio was great. Great! It was the first time someone who wasn't a friend or family complimented my work and I thought to myself: "Wow, maybe they're all right. Maybe I am good.")
So, I've been thinking about turning 30 and how that's supposed to be a big marker in one's life. Becoming an adult and all that. And how it really doesn't feel like that big of a deal to me. In fact, birthday's were always super special to me because they are the one day when I can truly be a princess and accept free coffees, compliments, and other special things—because "it's my birthday". Now that my focus has shifted off of myself and onto my kid, I almost forgot about my birthday.
I am thinking about putting myself and my creativity out there more. I'm thinking about trying more, allowing myself to make mistakes more. To use comic sans if it fits the project (ok, maybe not that extreme.) Ultimately, I think it's having Dara and knowing that she looks to me as an example of womanhood that is driving me to live my life to the fullest. To love my body (tummy-roll and all). To be healthy. To love my work. To create, to make mistakes, to learn. All these things will make me a better person, make me more happy and satisfied with life and in turn—show Dara that it's all possible.
With all these things on my mind, the following posts have inspired me and been bubbling around in the back of my mind:
via Anna at Door Sixteen "See, here’s the thing: ANYTHING that gets people to be more observant of their surroundings and helps them to not be afraid to experiment with expressing themselves visually is GOOD. It’s easy for a designer to roll their eyes when a “commoner” (heh) decides to play around with type and design their own book cover."
via Joy at Oh Joy! "I understand now why people always say that it just gets better with age. A lot of that stress, anxiety, and lack of confidence about who you are and who you want to be just gets less and less."
via an email response from Jordan at Oh Happy Day! (who is living the dream and is a daily inspiration to me) "I think there is something to just creating (and working) as much as you can. Even if its not great at first. That's how you get better. I always hate 50% of the stuff I do but you have to creat it all tho get the 50% I do like."